I'ts Never Been This Bad

So we are having our last Class Meeting today and Student Z has a problem; well, actually TWO problems.

Someone in our class is kicking him in the shin in the lunchline and in the classroom. (The audacity, I say!) I have him and a girl demonstrate the kicking. Then I asked him if the kicking was hard enough to cause bruises. He didn't think so, but to be sure he had to check each of his shins.

Then I asked him to demonstrate the SECOND problem, which is someone pretends to be a midget in the morning line and hits him. When it comes to the demonstration he says he can't do it to the girl because the hit (and he points) is in his private parts.

Well! This is the end of the year and do you see what magnitude of problems we have been having! Student A sitting next to me, leans over and says very seriously, "Oh no, this is the worst problem we've had all year. It's never been this bad."

It was so hard to keep a straight face.

I indicate that I will have to speak to Student Z privately and find out the name of the culprits.

At the end of the meeting, four likely suspects come up to me and turn themselves in. Hilarious! I guess we have a lot of kicking and midget playing.

However I do know the MAJOR offender and lucky for me his dad picks him up EVERY night right outside our door.

So he had to fess up to Dad. I don't think his weekend is going to be a good one.

Where will I get all these great stories when I retire?????