Body Shapes

When I was walking Bailey on the bike path today I wasn't paying attention to nature, I was looking at body shapes.

I am totally envious of the women who walk or run by me that have small little thighs. Their thighs don't stick out on the sides creating a shelf. They fit under their hips. I want thighs like that.

When I found this body shape photo I was even more discouraged. I have a SPOON shape! I don't wanna be a spoon. I wanna be a knife.

long, slim, slender, just a slip of a thing

And at 58 I am coming to the acceptance of my utensil shape. I may not LIKE it, but I am accepting it.

It's now clear to me why I have no upper body strength. Can you imagine what my arms would look like to lift that spoon bottom?

When I was in high school we had a gymnastics unit in PE. We worked on the trampoline, the rings, maybe we even did tumbling, but the one piece of equipment I CLEARLY remember is the horse.

Do you remember what the horse is? It's a thick leather covered body on four legs, with two semi circle handles on the top. The idea is to run up, grab the handles with your hands and swing your body over. Believe me there is a swing to my hips, but not UP in the air.

During this PE unit we transitioned the various centers and I could never get my arms to get my hips over the horse. Useless. Impossible. There was no way I was going to gain the muscle needed during this unit, that year, or my lifetime.

So one day the gym teacher announces we will 'test' over the equipment.

Oh, I think I broke out in hives. I was going to have to do the horse.

My turn came and I told her, "I can't."

She said, "You must."

I may have tried one more rebuttal, but full well knowing that she held all the cards (grades) and if I was no athletic prowess,  I was obedient.

So with my nonexistent gymnastic skill and with as much optimism as I could muster (a little below WTF and a little above panic attack) I made a run for it.

With the entire class watching.

 Can you say MORTIFICATION?

I think running through my head was the thought...hey maybe today is the day.

So on approach I put my arms out for the handles, raised my body up about 2 inches, and slide underneath.

One of my finer moments.

Too bad Youtube didn't exist then. I could have had my claim to fame early in life.

I'm sure I died of embarrassment. I'm sure the girls laughed (thank heavens it was a girls class and not coed!)

Upon reflection I think I could have been saved the trauma. All Mrs. Golden (ancient PE teacher) had to do was see that my body shape was the same as hers and there was no way she was gonna mount that horse either!