Writing Class Submission

The Formative Years

Recently I was in my hometown and I met a brother of a former classmate. I didn’t really recall the brother nor the classmate, for that matter. I’m sure he felt the same. Our worlds did not revolve around each other those oh so many years ago, but upon this chance meeting we are older and wiser and more willing to accept each other as peers.

I ask if he lives in town and this proceeds for him to give me the Clift notes of his adult life. It was an interesting tale and I think I would have enjoyed listening to the longer version, but we were interrupted, but not before he has had a chance to state that he was a “nerd” in high school. This of course brings the perfunctory laughter and a shrug as if to say: “weren’t we all”

As I was driving home I found myself reflecting on that conversation and its refreshing quality. We can now, these 45 or more years later, state with no embarrassment the true condition of our life then. Those high school years were hard. We want so badly to fit in, be popular, or gifted in some manner, but truth be told only a precious few ever fit in that category for that moment in time.

And that’s the larger truth. High School was just one moment in time, even though it spanned four years. For some it was the peak, for others just the beginning and for many it was the preschool of adulthood.

However High School never felt like a small sliver of our lifetime. It felt like the end all. Our lives depended on going to Prom, making the team, getting the lead, having a boyfriend or girlfriend and if none of those expectations were met we were devastated; sometimes beyond consolation.

And no matter how much an adult said, “This too shall pass.” we knew it would not. We knew we would be scarred for life. We knew our life was over.

And it was not. We moved on. We grew older. And as we aged reflection gave us pause and wisdom to know that those high school years were a phase, just as now is a chapter.

But hopefully now we can look at our current stage and be grateful for the opportunities we experience. We can appreciate the stories of others who have arrived here with us. We can acknowledge that every step we have taken, whether it be as a nerd or the cool kid, brought us to this point and with each step we grew.

We now know the meaning of “This too shall pass.” We are fully aware that the emotions of this moment, whether of a majestic nature or a devastating shock, will shift and change creating a weather map of our lives.

It’s just that now, with all those years behind us, we are better prepared to accept all that comes before us. It doesn’t matter if we ever went to Prom. If we did make the team, but always sat on the bench, that too has given us more enrichment than we know how to express.

Every year, not just the early ones, are our formative years. For each moment, each experience, has profoundly affected our development and now, in these last stages of our life performance, can we appreciate and reflect upon the spanning view.